interview – Gay Men's Brotherhood

The Body Count Dilemma: Why Gay Men Can’t Win

In gay culture, “body count” refers to how many people you’ve slept with. And whether it’s high or low, it often feels like a no-win situation. Have a low body count and you risk being seen as repressed, inexperienced, or undesirable. Have a high one and you’re either celebrated… or slut shamed. In this off-the-cuff conversation, we unpack why gay men are stuck between purity culture and performance culture, and how both distort our relationship to sex, desire, and self-worth. We explore: This episode isn’t about judging how much sex you’ve had. It’s about reclaiming choice, agency, and a healthier relationship to desire. Join the Sexual Empowerment 101 7-week men’s group Link Today’s Hosts: Support the Show – viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes – CONNECT WITH US – – LEARN WITH US –

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Nesting: Creating Platonic Spaces for Healing and Authentic Connection in the Gay Community

Matt Landsiedel

What we want you to gain from this episode is the importance of non-sexualized, safe, and brave spaces for gay men to heal and grow together. By the end of this episode, you will be able to identify what a nest is, how you could benefit from one, and where to find or create one if you are interested in nesting. The concepts and questions we explore in this episode are: Today’s Guest: Nigel Pedlingham Today’s Host: Matt Landsiedel Support the Show – viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes – CONNECT WITH US – – LEARN WITH US –

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Falling in Love With The Fantasy

Michael DiIorio

Some of us don’t fall in love with people, we fall in love with an idea of them. The story, the potential, the fantasy of the perfect boyfriend who finally makes everything click. But that idealized version of love often keeps us chasing what looks right instead of what feels real. In this episode, Michael DiIorio and therapist, Michael Pezzullo, explore how fantasy, perfectionism, and external validation shape the way we love- and why chasing the ideal often keeps us from the real thing. We’ll unpack: If you’ve ever been in love with potential or the picture-perfect relationship, this conversation will help you come back to reality…where real connection actually happens. Today’s Guest: Michael Pezzullo Today’s Host: Michael DiIorio Support the Show – viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes – CONNECT WITH US – – LEARN WITH US –

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How to Find More Joy in Your Life

Matt Landsiedel

Joy isn’t just fireworks and big milestones; it’s in the ordinary, everyday moments we often overlook. Yet for many of us, joy feels slippery and hard to find. In this episode of Gay Men Going Deeper, we’re diving into what joy really feels like, how it shifts as we evolve and age, and why it’s less about chasing highs and more about cultivating presence. We’ll explore: If you’re ready to move beyond quick fixes and start building a life that feels nourishing, playful, and deeply fulfilling, this conversation is for you. Today’s Hosts: Support the Show – viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes – CONNECT WITH US – – LEARN WITH US –

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Perfectionism, Pressure, and the Gay Overachiever

Michael DiIorio

You know the type — ambitious, perfectionistic, and always striving to do more and be more… yet secretly fuelled by pressure, anxiety, and fear. In this episode, Michael is joined by special guest Scott Stirrett as they share their own stories of hustling for achievement and how they’ve learned to stay ambitious without destroying themselves in the process. Together, they unpack how perfectionism, internalized shame, and the need for external validation can be ways we attempt to outrun our insecurities — and pivot toward ambition that’s healthy, sustainable, and soul-driven. Topics covered in this episode: By the end of this episode, you’ll be inspired to pursue success in a way that keeps you driven and impactful — without burning yourself out — and to start measuring your worth from the inside out. Today’s Guest: Scott Stirrett Today’s Host: Michael DiIorio Support the Show – viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes – CONNECT WITH US – – LEARN WITH US –

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Grieving Relationships

Matt Landsiedel

Not all grief is about death. Sometimes, the hardest losses are the people (or pets) who are still alive—but no longer in our lives. In this episode, we’re talking about the heartbreak of losing relationships: romantic breakups, friendship fallouts, and the deep sadness that comes with saying goodbye to a beloved pet. We explore how grief shows up emotionally, mentally, and even physically—and the unique challenges of letting go of someone who once meant everything to you. Together, we share personal experiences of: This conversation shines a light on the many ways we experience loss and how to move through the grief with compassion, courage, and clarity. Related Episodes: Today’s Hosts: Support the Show – viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes – CONNECT WITH US – – LEARN WITH US –

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The Problem With Self-Love

Michael DiIorio

We all know self-love is important, but what happens when it goes too far in the wrong direction? In this episode, Michael DiIorio is joined by therapist Michael Pezzullo for an honest conversation about the shadow side of self-love. Together, they explore: You’ll learn about the Self-Love Spectrum, the signs of self-coddling and self-bulldozing, and how to practice a more empowering, growth-oriented version of self-love- without abandoning your need for care and compassion. Join us for an episode that will help you get honest about how you love yourself, and what real self-love actually looks like. Today’s Guest: Michael Pezzullo Today’s Host: Michael DiIorio Support the Show – viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes – CONNECT WITH US – – LEARN WITH US –

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Why Do I Keep Attracting Unavailable Men?

Matt Landsiedel

In this episode, Matt speaks with queer relationship coach Lonay Halloum about why we attract unavailable men. This episode will provide you with a deeper understanding of your relationship patterns and why you might be attracting unavailable men. This episode was inspired by a deep desire to help you heal the subconscious programs that lead to self-abandonment so you can end this exhausting cycle and finally attract available men. The concepts and questions we explore in this episode are: Related Topics: Today’s Guest: Lonay Halloum Today’s Host: Matt Landsiedel Support the Show – viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes – CONNECT WITH US – – LEARN WITH US –

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Claiming Your Power

Michael DiIorio

We may be adults, but a lot of us are still living in emotional childhood—blaming others for how we feel and how we act. When you give other people control over your emotions, you give away your power. In this episode, we’re breaking down what it means to take responsibility for your emotions and why it is fundamental if you want true freedom, stronger relationships, and genuine self-confidence. We’ll share personal stories of when we were stuck in emotional immaturity and how we learned to take responsibility for our emotions We’re covering: This isn’t about being perfect. It’s about waking up, stepping up, and taking your power back. Today’s Hosts: Support the Show – viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes – CONNECT WITH US – – LEARN WITH US –

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How to Soften the Inner Critic

Matt Landsiedel

In this episode, Matt speaks with author and love advocate, Scott Stabile. Together, they break down the psycho-spiritual aspects of the inner critic and how to best work with it from a place of love. If you are someone who is hard on yourself and has a tough time finding self-love and self-compassion, this episode will help you develop greater awareness of your inner critic, where self-judgment originates, and how you can start practicing more acceptance of yourself and others through presence, love, and compassion. The concepts and questions we explore in this episode are: Today’s Guest: Scott Stabile Today’s Host: Matt Landsiedel Support the Show – viewer and listener support helps us to continue making episodes – CONNECT WITH US – – LEARN WITH US –

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